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How many baboons could you take in a fight? (armed only with a giant dildo) Quiz

How many baboons could you take in a fight? (armed only with a giant dildo)

How many baboons could you take in a fight? (armed only with a giant dildo)

How many baboons could you take in a fight? (armed only with a giant dildo)

1.How much experience do you have swinging a baseball bat?

Little to none
Some experience- little league baseball, etc
Experienced -I played baseball in high school or recreationally
Very experienced - I practice in batting cages or played in college

10 questions remain

2.If a baboon bit your ear off, which emotion would it most likely invoke?

Fear, panic, and tears
Shock and horror
A murderous rage as black as my cold, dead heart

9 questions remain

3.In your lifetime, how many fights have you been in?

0
1
2-3
4-6
More than 6

8 questions remain

4.How far can you kick a soccer ball?

I have no idea
A short distance, maybe 20-49 feet
Moderate distance, 50-100 feet
Very far - more than 100 feet

7 questions remain

5.Could you kick the head off a fast-moving baboon?

Yes
No

6 questions remain

6.Describe how much experience you have boxing:

None
A little, messing around with siblings or friends
Moderate amount
Highly experienced - college, martial arts, or otherwise

5 questions remain

7.Do you think you could still throw forceful punches with monkey blood splattered in your eyes?

No
Yes
I punch better when the smell of blood is in the air

4 questions remain

8.Can you multi-task, or do you prefer to work on one thing at a time?

Multi-tasker
One thing at a time

3 questions remain

9.How strong is your bite?

I have no idea
Fairly strong, I chew beef jerky and/or gum pretty regularly
Very strong - I can chew a beer can in half.

2 questions remain

10.Have you ever played whack-a-mole?

Yes
No

1 questions remain

11.Have you ever played whack-a-mole, except the moles were shrieking baboons and the hammer was a giant rubber dildo?

Yes
No
No, but that sounds like the greatest sport in the history of athleticism

final question!

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